Sales associates always tell me to “size down,” too. I listened to them for far too long! I had a tailor who also told me to take in the waist, even though I vastly prefer a low-slung pant and will take whatever size I need to achieve the look. I no longer go to this tailor, who always argued with what I said I wanted. Sleeve length on blazers was another contentious issue. Actually, I just sold two blazers - most people would think I’m crazy to have done so. Standing perfectly still, they looked great, but I and my broad shoulders felt constricted and I never reached for them. I also got rid of some jeans that only fit when I’m at my lowest weight. Exhausting!
I do weigh myself quite a bit because my preferred “big pants” won’t let me know if things are creeping upwards and I’ve been guilty of playing games with myself. But I absolutely love to eat and drink - life is too short for constant deprivation.
Omg This! These two eps on size were so eye-opening - So much to unpack here! The whole topic of sizing can be so triggering... Definitely resonate with the not going shopping with friends - haven't been able to go for years because as a teen at college I was scarred by an experience by an ex friend who commented on my size etc. Spent years obsessing over my actual size and body size, and not realising that garments were engineered to fit a certain way - this is where that word flattering comes into play - where we are expected to fit into garments that flatter our bodies, whatever that evens means! I really dislike that word! It has taken me getting into my 40s to separate size from weight from health. It takes years to realise that size labels are literally just a number, and that fit and feel, as well as the ideal (unique to you) proportion is far more important! I now want to work on my body size for health and movement, but I want my clothes to fit in a way that feels comfortable for me. I too love shopping all over the store, especially men's! This is where it is so important to trust your instincts and your own personal style as your best tools! I wholeheartedly agree and support your notion of being size agnostic! Thank you for so much goood and wise insight Rachel! XoXo
Awww so glad you listened and enjoyed -- and just re-reading that you're in your 40s since you look so young. The skin! But growing up is such a pleasure for all these reasons. Thank you for this note, my friend.
I love these postings/podcasts, thank you for adding them to your already great content. So many people struggle with that voice turning size into a judgement - even my husband, who is not vain and completely uninterested in fashion. Reframing size as a tool is brilliant. Removes the negativity and replaces it with creativity. It does feel like designers/brands have so messed with sizing that they have inadvertently helped me with the psychological hurdles. I could look at 10 brands and be 10 different sizes in a skirt that’s supposed to sit at your natural waist. It’s also made shopping a little more exhausting!
"Removes the negativity and replaces it with creativity." Yes! And you are so right. No one has solved for sizing yet. It makes in person, second hand shopping so much more appealing.
Wow, so many amazing points and thank you for putting them all into this cohesive message! Your points about shoe sizing, how we speak to a friend vs ourselves and size just being a tool that is often just the point of view of a designer are so well taken and so well articulated!!!
Sales associates always tell me to “size down,” too. I listened to them for far too long! I had a tailor who also told me to take in the waist, even though I vastly prefer a low-slung pant and will take whatever size I need to achieve the look. I no longer go to this tailor, who always argued with what I said I wanted. Sleeve length on blazers was another contentious issue. Actually, I just sold two blazers - most people would think I’m crazy to have done so. Standing perfectly still, they looked great, but I and my broad shoulders felt constricted and I never reached for them. I also got rid of some jeans that only fit when I’m at my lowest weight. Exhausting!
I do weigh myself quite a bit because my preferred “big pants” won’t let me know if things are creeping upwards and I’ve been guilty of playing games with myself. But I absolutely love to eat and drink - life is too short for constant deprivation.
I so relate to where you are and love how you are articulating it. Thanks for this note!
Love how you’re able to generate so many interesting discussion topics!
This is such an important topic so thank you! 🙏
And thank you for listening!
Omg This! These two eps on size were so eye-opening - So much to unpack here! The whole topic of sizing can be so triggering... Definitely resonate with the not going shopping with friends - haven't been able to go for years because as a teen at college I was scarred by an experience by an ex friend who commented on my size etc. Spent years obsessing over my actual size and body size, and not realising that garments were engineered to fit a certain way - this is where that word flattering comes into play - where we are expected to fit into garments that flatter our bodies, whatever that evens means! I really dislike that word! It has taken me getting into my 40s to separate size from weight from health. It takes years to realise that size labels are literally just a number, and that fit and feel, as well as the ideal (unique to you) proportion is far more important! I now want to work on my body size for health and movement, but I want my clothes to fit in a way that feels comfortable for me. I too love shopping all over the store, especially men's! This is where it is so important to trust your instincts and your own personal style as your best tools! I wholeheartedly agree and support your notion of being size agnostic! Thank you for so much goood and wise insight Rachel! XoXo
Awww so glad you listened and enjoyed -- and just re-reading that you're in your 40s since you look so young. The skin! But growing up is such a pleasure for all these reasons. Thank you for this note, my friend.
I love these postings/podcasts, thank you for adding them to your already great content. So many people struggle with that voice turning size into a judgement - even my husband, who is not vain and completely uninterested in fashion. Reframing size as a tool is brilliant. Removes the negativity and replaces it with creativity. It does feel like designers/brands have so messed with sizing that they have inadvertently helped me with the psychological hurdles. I could look at 10 brands and be 10 different sizes in a skirt that’s supposed to sit at your natural waist. It’s also made shopping a little more exhausting!
"Removes the negativity and replaces it with creativity." Yes! And you are so right. No one has solved for sizing yet. It makes in person, second hand shopping so much more appealing.
Wow, so many amazing points and thank you for putting them all into this cohesive message! Your points about shoe sizing, how we speak to a friend vs ourselves and size just being a tool that is often just the point of view of a designer are so well taken and so well articulated!!!
I have always said shopping is not a team activity ( for me) - maybe this is partly why🙃
Sighhhh 😘
Great segment. But the Pepperidge Farm cookies!
I don't like interference with my joy! XO
Wonderful to hear, Janel! Thank you 🙏