60 Comments

I was so touched by this and the suddenness of his death. Your description of clothes as a joyful diversion is apt. Since I was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, clothes have been a joyful diversion for me and I've often wondered if that makes me shallow or superficial. But then I think of the joy it gives me and how it lifts my spirits, and that is a way of surviving the dark times. Thank you for putting that into words ❤️

Expand full comment

I am so moved and I am so sorry, and I am sending you love.

Expand full comment

Gosh I am so sorry to hear it, and empathise. When I lie awake at night and think about my mum, dad, no longer here and lost to rare diseases, strangely I think about what I will wear the next day and somehow it helps me keep going. I don’t understand the mechanism, but reading your words makes me feel connected at the most fundamental level, thank you

Expand full comment

I am so sorry tor such loss in your life and honored that you have shared it. And that you are here. ❤️

Expand full comment

Thank you for your kindness ❤️

Expand full comment

Rachel thank you for sharing your sorrow. Sending warmth.

Expand full comment

Sending you a big hug. I’m so sorry I know how empathetic you are and cannot imagine how sad you must feel. I’m glad you get to play in your closet and cope with the beauty and the terror that life is ❤️💕

Expand full comment

This note! Thanks for always being such a supportive friend to ne. 😘

Expand full comment

I’m so sorry for your loss and for the rip in the universe. It sounds like he was a wonderful light.

Expand full comment

A rip in the universe. Yes. Thank you. ❤️

Expand full comment

I am moved by your thoughtful and touching piece. I am so sorry for your loss - he was your friend! ❤️

Expand full comment

I didn’t realize I loved him but it turns out I did. ❤️

Expand full comment

My heartfelt condolences to this family. Losing a child is unimaginable...

Expand full comment

Truly. Thank you.

Expand full comment

Everyday I sign off my journal with “ be with us, all of us, here and not”.

Sending strength and love to you and to that young man’s family…❤️‍🩹

Expand full comment

That is a beautiful way to sign off, thank you. ❤️

Expand full comment

You articulated something I’ve been feeling for a long time, but couldn’t quite find the words. Sending light to you and condolences for your loss.

Expand full comment

❤️ thank you -- I really appreciate that. So much.

Expand full comment

We need to get lost in books, in love, and in clothes. --> what a bittersweet observation. I’m so sorry for your loss.

Expand full comment

❤️ thank you

Expand full comment

Oh dear, Rachel, that is just the saddest news. I'm so sorry you lost your friend regardless of how well you knew him. I get it and how it also brings up these bigger perspectives on life and mortality and love and joy. So grateful you are in my life even though we also don't know each other well. I consider you a friend. Blessings and a big hug.

Expand full comment

Lisa, thank you for this note, which also made me cry, and also very much helps.

Expand full comment

I’m so sorry. May his memory be a blessing

Expand full comment

😘 thank you

Expand full comment

Such a heartbreaking, tragic story- some days it feels incredibly difficult to hold both the joy and sorrow together, but I have learned since the death of my mom that not only is it possible, it is absolutely necessary for our well-being. As for the clothes, you reminded me of a post I did during the pandemic- Fashion as hope. The clothes- the dreaming up and putting together outfits- can fill us with a sense of possibility and remind us that there is always something to look forward to, somewhere to go, people to meet and good times to be had. Definitional hope...xx

Expand full comment

You are a person I knew would understand. Grateful 🥹

Expand full comment

This is such a tragic story but a beautifully written tribute!!

Expand full comment

😘

Expand full comment

I’m so sorry Rachel. I think many reading this feel you, feel it and know exactly what you are saying here. It’s never the “how” it’s always the “why” - and you are right - we all lose ourselves in things to find joy because yes life is hard, because we need distractions to survive. Because sadly, in all ways, life moves on and THAT is sometimes the strangest feeling. I send you and his family light and love.

Expand full comment

Life moves on. Yes. Sometimes it hurts to move and hurts to stay still. I would like to hug you right now. 😘

Expand full comment

I am new to reading this and am very touched by your words. So very true and heartfelt as well as heartbreaking. Thank you for sharing this with us.

Expand full comment

Thank you so much for reading and for writing ❤️

Expand full comment