What I wore all week: Seeking calm, finding color

some of @neelam’s beautiful consistency on IG

I need to admit this to you. Sometimes I drift off to sleep with a book. And sometimes I drift off to sleep with Neelam. I visualize her IG page. It’s so … relaxing. Thoughtful. Clear. I wish doing this mindful meditation would permeate my brain with her singular vision. And I would wake up with her clarity of mind.

But last night (for example), I dreamed I was trying to leave someplace but I couldn’t find my passport, and I kept getting distracted by tacos. That about sums it up. (PSA: tequila cocktail close to bedtime is never a good choice.)

When will I accept that part of me is the zing-zang-zag of ahas and whoas and all this! all that! Versus the Neelammmm calmmmmmm. And you know, I still have a style, I feel! Case in point, I complimented Neelam about something recently and she said, “I knew you’d like that.” See? A (zigging and zagging but still) thru line. A style.

All this to say that in spite of moments where I feel soothed and in love with understated menswear and by the comforts of neutrals, in the end, for me, some days are farmer’s market salad and some days are 11 layer coconut cake.

A week in color shot me out of a cannon. In a good way. The first few days were a true challenge; I realize I’m not keeping enough color in Boston, where I need it most. Note to self. And at the end of it all, I craved the calm again.

MONDAY

What: Tibi suede-y pants (multiple sizes here). Old Express sequin turtleneck (this is similar, in small). Ralph Lauren chambray shirt (like this). Navy Saks brand cashmere sweater as scarf. Tibi green socks (these look good!). Red Camper shoes (old, but this is what they are). Secondhand Lemaire silky blazer (like this).

Why: In the Boston studio. Just working. Some errands. Seeing my parents. No meetings. And dinner at night with my son + hub at a new cool Korean restaurant, which was incredible. Add to Boston list. I wanted to be cozy, comfortable, decent enough for the restaurant.

Outcome: The sock was the hero for me, here. Lofted Settledness isn’t just about feeling “good” — I get there when I feel “fashion” (or something adjacent). The f*d up-ness of the flash of green sock made me feel that, versus just the nice red color pop against the brown.

TUESDAY

What: MM6 green suit from a year(ish) ago (vest and pants). Dad’s hand-me-down croc belt. Navy Saks cashmere. Slate blue Tibi polo sweater, which I half tucked ala Paris runways to see if that made me feel anything. On x Loewe black cherry sneakers I told paid subs about in 6 Gems.

Why: Going to the hospital in the AM to be with fam as my F-I-L had a routine procedure (all is well). Meetings. And lunch+ with Susanne, my friend + biz partner. I wanted to feel comfy (and the suit is really floppy and comfy vs. constricted) and look good on Zoom. It’s a combination of colors I’d never tried.

Outcome: I loved this. The soothing bridge color of the polo sweater and the off ness of the sneaker made it feel great, and I DID get something from the collar being self consciously “off” — like I felt less princess-y — even if mom adjusted me.

(As always, everyone sees 2 looks and links and the rest of the week is for the paid folks as a thank you. I feel exposed sharing this stuff, and also finding it all is a lot! I don’t yet have a helper here, either. So I really appreciate the support.)